Day Twenty-Five

Drinking: iced coffee
Reading: Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus

So, it's the fourth of July. Our nation's Independence Day . Somehow, it feels a little hollow to me. It could be that it falls in the middle of the week, or it could be that I should have gotten out of town to make it feel more like a holiday and less like sitting around waiting for things to happen.

Our heatwave in St. Louis continues. Today's high temperature is supposed to be 105 degrees. With this in mind, I decided to get out of the house and get some exercise before the sun got too high in the sky.

I got up early, had some iced coffee and a couple of eggs and then headed over to the zoo about 8:00, hoping to get a look at the new sea lion pool and viewing area that opened this past weekend. The joke was on me! I got to the zoo about 8:30 and found it was already crowded with other folks who had the same idea as me. I also found out that the sea lions don't come out of their night time enclosure until around 9:15 to allow the keepers to clean up the outdoor enclosure and get ready for the day.

The new pool is pretty great. Much larger than the old one. And it has a tunnel that goes for about 30 feet under the pool where visitors can look up and see the animals swimming around overhead. I understand that the new digs are better for the sea lions as well, now having a cooling system that keeps the water at 65 degrees year round whereas the old pool was just a 10 - 12 foot deep pool with no facility for cooling the water. It must have been pretty miserable swimming around in that on days like today.

A couple of minor complaints: The rocks in and around the exhibit are man-made and look it. They're supposed to mimic the rocky shores along California's coast. But, while they are artfully done, they don't look natural. They look like some molded concrete/fiberglass compound and not like natural rock. It may be that after a while they'll "wear in" and look less manufactured. I hope so,anyway. The other downside is that there were so many people trying to get into the tunnel at 9:15 that it would have been another half hour or so before I could have gotten through the crush (not really a line and with a lot of rude, pushy, hot people to contend with). So, I decided not to try and to come back in a few weeks when the weather should be better and the crowd should be thinner.

While walking around the zoo, I stopped in at the bird house, mostly to kill time while waiting for the sea lions. The birds are beautiful, as is the architecture of the building. And it is cooler that outside today. While I was walking and looking at the birds and listening to their whistles, calls and cries, I noticed an older couple walking through the house. They appeared to be in their seventies and so happy to be in each other's company. They held hands while walking, laughed, read facts from the exhibit signs to each other and talked about what they were reading with great interest. The man was intent on making sure he found each bird in each cage, regardless of how well they blended with the foliage. And the woman was just as invested in him finding them and pointing them out to her. Their interaction was so joyful and respectful.

I so much want to be part of a couple like that when I'm their age. I want to be with someone who I love and who loves me in a gentle, kind, supportive way. I want to be with someone who is happy to be with me, but doesn't need to cling and doesn't want to be clung to. I think I have that kind of relationship now with Jane, but because of my own issues/baggage, I am not trusting it as completely as I should. It will take work on my part, but it is possible and I'll get there.

More later....

Day Twenty-Three

I had tried to post last night, but for some reason, my computer decided to delete what I had written and it never made it to being published. By that time, it was late, I was tired, and it seemed like maybe the computer had made the better decision by sending my written thoughts into limbo. As a result, rather than try to recreate the whole thing, I opted for another glass of wine, listening to a little Bach and going to bed.

Now I'm back at it this afternoon and we'll see what happens.

It's been brutally hot here in St. Louis St. Louis with temperatures between 100 and 110 for a week. Fortunately, the humidity that we're usually cursed with has been low and, as a result, the heat has been reasonably bearable. But this has made me less willing than usual to get outside or to drive to friends' houses or meet them at restaurants and bars. I've been mostly holing up at home.

I did get out to visit my daughter and her husband and my granddaughter. The little squirt has just turned ten months old and if she isn't walking by the end of this week, I'll be very surprised. She's cute as a button, happy as can be, and smart! She's beginning to talk and has a vocabulary of about a dozen words. I got to spend a little over an hour with the bunch of them before they all had to run off to visit with another set of relatives. It's a day later and I still feel pretty happy and positive about the world. Maybe all we need to improve the world is to spend more time with happy babies.

Of course, if that's the correct prescription for a better, happier world, we'll also have to spend more of our time making sure that more babies are happy, healthy, and well cared for. Otherwise there won't be enough happy babies to go around. It seems like a worthwhile effort, though.

More later....